Generation Dinner: A Better Society Starts at the Table

By Jane Wise, sustainability student, IU South Bend

Does Small Talk Make A Big Difference?

In the majority of American homes, a specific place exists where a family can discuss, share experiences, and work through issues. Perhaps this place is the living room, the sitting room, or even the family car. While a family can connect mostly anywhere, there’s no place quite like the family dinner table. It’s not only where we eat, but where we bridge the gaps between people and ideas.

At the table, we are expected to listen and follow a set of rules. But at such a simple place as the family dining table, how can one expect to make a big difference? Talking, eating, and connecting is one of the surest ways to understand those around you; especially in the parent-child relationship, which is an enormous concern in our modern society. With the invent of video games and thousands of television channels at their disposal, children are at risk of becoming more and more estranged from the family unit. The table is the hub of family activity and bonding; but how does the loss or gain of family dinner time help or hinder American children, and the very future of the world? We’ll explore the importance of the family table in regards to children, and how the table (and happier children) support a sustainable future.

Part One: The Worth of the Table

It can be difficult to pinpoint exactly what makes the dinner table such a worthy component of a good society and the key to happier kids. The secrets are in the rituals; what families do at the table, what they discuss, and what they eat. Table rituals “promote togetherness, reinforce social bonds, and foster a sense of belonging, creating preconditions for civil exchanges in a structured context”[1]. In other words, the table teaches us how to communicate with others and how to experience and handle social bonds. Defined this way, the table begins to resemble a political vantage point rather than just a place to set the plates. Flammang describes how eating promotes respect between different bodies; we are forced to listen and digest another person’s point of view because of the social expectations surrounding the dining experience. In a way, the table is extremely political- and that’s exactly why eating there can promote a better society. Talking at the table is one of the best ways to learn how to debate respectfully, and how to bridge gaps between two opposing viewpoints. The more people are educated to respectfully consider and challenge views, the better for our society at large. When it comes to children, lessons learned at the table are “remembered and typically reproduced well into adulthood”[2]. This means that family dinners and conversations, started early, can be an essential way to ensure that these valuable social roles are practiced in adulthood. Because of this, table conversation is an important part of society and family relationships. Now that we understand the worth of table conversation, there are a lot of important questions to ask. For starters, how is the loss of table time affecting children and their lives? And how does this affect our society and sustainability as a whole?

Part Two: The Lessons of Dinner

While the table is an important part of a child’s social development, it is also important for other reasons. We can discover of the first these reasons by asking a simple question; what do most families eat at the dinner table? In fact, most families who sit down at the table are eating a healthier meal.

This makes sense when we consider that most of the people who do not have the time or energy to eat at home are usually at a drive-thru. We can deduce from this that the more children are eating at the table, the healthier their eating habits will be. Plus, the American habit of drive-thru dinners is supporting a system that is founded by poor practices (which we’ll discuss in the next section). Another important part of the family dinner table is that it promotes discussion. But this discussion does more than just teach children how to reason and debate; it opens up the barriers between family members in very powerful ways. The table advocates an atmosphere of comfort and understanding, an ideal place for children and parents to discuss issues that are occurring in their daily lives. One of those issues is directly related to food, as a study summarized by LiveStrong states that, “[children] reported peer influence as a reason for not eating both fruit, juice, and vegetables and low-fat foods”. This peer pressure can ultimately tie back to what’s being eaten at the table; a dinner of tofu and rice can bring back unwanted memories of being teased and berated for eating the same meal in the school cafeteria. The psychological impact of food on children is extremely important, considering the rise of childhood obesity in America. These issues are tied to the family table, and can be discussed between family members in a safe and understanding environment. In this way, the table is not only political but psychological; it can help children not only to enjoy food but also to understand it. Another component of the dining table is that it allows children a chance away from electronics and the media; most families have rules about cell phones at the table, or that the television be turned off at dinner. Not only does this promote social bonding between family members, it also bars children from unhealthy food advertising in the media, which is linked to the rise in childhood obesity. A study by the National Institute of Health states that, “when watching television, children learn that calorie-dense foods that are high in fat and sugar taste great and are extremely awarding to consume”. So, the more time that children are exposed to television, the more they are exposed to unhealthy advertising. However, a child who eats more meals at home may not be as easily tempted by these advertisements, and is even pulled away from the advertising in order to enjoy the meal with their families. In this way, dinner tables promote healthier practices and better communication between family members- important pieces of a balanced and better society.

Part Three: People, Prosperity, and Planet

Now that we have discussed the social benefits of the family dinner table, how does it contribute to a sustainable society? This topic is more easily expressed in the following chart:

Benefits of the Family Dinner Table for People, Prosperity, and Planet:

PEOPLE	PROSPERITY	PLANET
Promotes positive social interactions	Promotes home-cooked meals and local shopping	Lessens the support of fast food chains
Reinforces one’s place in the family/school/community	Less money spent in fast-food markets (decreased obesity)	Lessens the support of CAFO’s/monocrops

 

People: Eating at the family dinner table encourages family discussion and connection; not only does it support emotional bonds in the family, it promotes respectful discussion and debate between bodies. The family dinner table also reinforces one’s place in the family and advocates a sense of belonging. This belonging can also be enforced in the school or community. For example, using good manners at the table and learning how to affectively deal with disputes can be a very helpful tool for children at school. These communicative skills can also be applied in the community and beyond.

Prosperity: Families who eat at the dinner table are usually eating home-cooked meals. Prosperity refers to the economy, and eating home-cooked meals can concentrate more food dollars in the local food market. The more home-cooked meals a family eats, the more experimentation will occur in the kitchen. No one wants to eat the same meal every night, so many families may want to branch out and explore other food options. However, some families may not be able to afford local or organic options; but eating home-cooked meals is still beneficial! Although the food being eaten at the family table may not be organic or local, the food dollar is not being used to support the unhealthy food and practices found in fast food establishments.

Planet: When meals are continually eaten at the table, that families’ food dollar is not being spent in the fast-food industry. This industry takes part in many unsustainable practices; such as CAFO’s (Concentrated Animal Feeding Operations) and monocrops[3]. These poor agricultural practices lead to increased pollution and illness. Another benefit of home-cooked meals is that the food being eaten is less likely to result in obesity, especially in children. In this way, the family dinner table enforces healthier and more economical practices.

Conclusion: Defining the Table

The table is not just a place to eat. It is social, political, economic, and it does make a difference. In regards to children, the table is a place to learn social rules and etiquette, but it is also a place to communicate and connect with the family. The table is a place to escape from media and advertisement, and to return to our human roots. Sharing a meal together is one of the best ways to promote a better society; one that supports a healthier food system and prepares the next generation for a better world.