There were a lot of things I expected to gain from this trip. As a young student interested in science, I thought it would cement a love of research. As a lover of nature, I thought it would forge a strong tie between myself and the biodiversity of the tropics. Unfortunately I have found myself disillusioned from my research and feeling as though I am not entitled to live and work in the tropics.
I would like to preface this blog by saying that I hope to be proven wrong. As with any other time I come to the conclusion that a pervasive practice, system, or ideology is problematic, I hope that I am simply incorrect; that I overlooked something, that I inappropriately value certain aspects of the issue. My viewpoints are based on the experiences of this trip, the discussions I have had with peers and professors, and my reactions to those. I have not had as much time as I need to reflect on these reactions, nor do I believe that I have been exposed to a very wide range of viewpoints. However, I still do believe what I am about to say to be true.
There are a two main reasons why I am personally disillusioned from my research project. Firstly, and most importantly, I recognize the grave threat to human existence that is climate change, and how little time we have to enact massive changes to have a chance at combating it. While I recognize the importance of research and do not mean to generalize it, I personally would rather devote my time to directly supporting movements and organizations fighting climate change through activism, political action, and grassroots community-driven change. Scientific research is a noble pursuit requiring a large commitment of time and resources, but I view the need for immediate climate action as so pressing that I no longer want to participate in research.
I have simply noticed that I am not invested in my research project at the moment, and that sentiment appeared immediately after reading 6 Degrees and learning about the extent of the dangers of climate change. I may simply be shocked by the horrors of each projected increase in global average surface temperature, and as a result be reacting a bit too harshly, but something has definitely changed. I no longer enjoy thinking about growing older. Every time I think about raising children, settling down somewhere, or even saving for retirement now while I’m still young, it feels tainted by the possibility that I’ll be living in an apocalyptic world, perhaps without a functioning society, if I’m even alive at all. This future feels almost certain to me, and while I will do everything in my power to combat climate change, I fear the global systems in place will not change soon enough or to a great enough extent to matter.
I am unsure of what this means for me as an individual. I do not know how to react to probably experiencing the worst droughts, flooding events, sea level rise, mass migrations, infectious diseases, heat waves, and political turmoil in human history. I am simply at a loss for an adequate emotional coping mechanism. It feels futile to change my individual behavior, and only slightly less so to support political movements that may make a difference. On the other hand, it feels individualistic and selfish to give up, focus on myself and simply try to enjoy the end of global human civilization. I suppose the best course of action is to become involved in whatever I believe will cause the most change in my immediate area, while trying not to jeopardize my mental and physical health. In this sense, my attitude has not changed much, as that is how I tried to behave before this trip, I now just understand that the stakes are higher.
With climate change looming over my every move these past few days, I feel like my research project is simply unimportant, and I will have to reevaluate what I want to do in my future to see if research still fits into that. I am not ready to throw it out the window as a career option, but I have certainly become less passionate about it in the last few days.
Secondly, I am concerned about the sociopolitical landscape surrounding research in the tropics and the Global South as a whole. I think that if I were to continue in research it would be conservation focused, so that I could explore policy options or tangible courses of action individuals and organizations can take to combat climate change and create a more sustainable society.However, our meeting with the Ngöbe indigenous tribe has made me believe this is not appropriate for me to do in the Global South.
The statement that stood out the most to me during our conversation was that the Ngöbe people have ancient stories of respect for nature and its inhabitants, and they live in accordance with this reverence, asking for permission to hunt animals for meat for example. They lived within the ecosystem of the forest, in a “sustainable”, “conservation-oriented” way long before those terms were introduced into public discourse in the Global North.
They then voiced their frustration that white people then travel to their country and attempt to teach them about conservation, when excessive resource extraction from systems of capitalism and colonialism perpetuated by white people are the very things that created the necessity to conserve. This hypocrisy is not something in which I wish to participate. I feel as though I should be learning from indigenous tribes like the Ngöbe to practice conservation, and I should assist them in whatever way I can to gain autonomy and the ability to carry out their lifestyle as they wish.
The hypocrisy of “teaching” people about conservation as a member of the Global North is not limited to the context of indigenous tribes. The US and the EU have contributed to about 47% of historical greenhouse gas emissions (Ritchie), only make up 10.1% of the global population (“Population Comparison: China, EU, USA, and Japan”), and therefore bear the most responsibility for the disasters and mass suffering likely to occur as a result. It is our overconsumption, excessive resource extraction, and colonial oppression that are the root causes of the issue, and for that reason I don’t understand how I could be in a position to prescribe more “sustainable practices” to countries in the Global South like Costa Rica. I have determined that if I want to stay involved in conservation and research informing it, I must do so in the US or the EU so as not to perpetuate a global system disturbingly reminiscent of colonialism.
Works Cited:
“Population Comparison: China, EU, USA, and Japan.” Worldometer, https://www.worldometers.info/population/china-eu-usa-japan-comparison/.
Ritchie, Hannah. “Who Has Contributed Most to Global CO2 Emissions?” Our World in Data, 1 Oct. 2019, https://ourworldindata.org/contributed-most-global-co2.
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